tap-quotes-npm-pkg/index.js

This NPM package delivers random quotes and lyrics from the movie This is Spinal Tap. 570 different strings.

const quotes = [
  `No light fantastic ever crosses my mind
  That meditation stuff can make you go blind`,

  `Just crank that music to the point of pain
  Why waste good music on a brain?`,

  `Heavy, duty
  Heavy duty rock and roll
  Heavy duty
  Brings out the duty in my soul`,

  `I see you dancing there in front of the band
  You're playin' the solos with no guitar in your hand`,

  `I don't pull no punches I wouldn't waste your time
  And just cause it pays, that ain't no crime`,

  `NIGEL: Well, I don’t know, wh-wh-what are the hours?
  THE END`,

  `Heavy, duty
  Heavy duty rock and roll
  Heavy duty
  Brings out the duty in my soul`,

  `Don't need a woman, I won't take me no wife
  I get the rock and roll and that'll be my life`,

  `No page in history baby - that, I don't need
  I just want to make some eardrums bleed`,

  `When there was darkness and the void was king and ruled the elements
  When there was silence and the hush was almost deafening`,

  `Out of the emptiness
  (Salvation) Salvation
  Rhythm and light and sound`,

  `Twas the rock and roll creation
  Twas a terrible big bang
  Twas the ultimate mutation
  Ying was searching for his yang`,

  `And he looked and he saw that it was good`,

  `When I'm alone beneath the stars and feeling insignificant
  I turn within to see the forces that created me`,

  `I look to the stars and the answer is clear
  I look in the mirror and see what I fear`,

  `Tis the rock and roll creation
  Tis the absolute rebirth
  Tis the rolling of the ocean and the rocking of the earth
  And I looked and I saw that it was good`,

  `The elves are dressed in leather
  And the angels are in chains
  (Christmas with the Devil)`,

  `The sugar plums are rancid
  And the stockings are in flames
  (Christmas with the Devil)`,

  `There's a demon in my belly
  And a gremlin in my brain`,

  `There's someone up the chimney hole
  And Satan is his name`,

  `The rats ate all the presents
  And the reindeer ran away
  (Christmas with the Devil)`,

  `There'll be no Father Christmas
  'Cause it's Evil's holiday
  (Christmas with the Devil)`,

  `No bells in Hell
  No snow below
  Silent Night, Violent Night`,

  `So come, all ye unfaithful
  Don't be left out in the cold
  You don't need no invitation, no...
  Your ticket is your soul`,

  `You been bad
  Don't do what I say
  You don't listen
  And you never obey`,

  `Try to teach you
  But you just won't be good
  You won't behave the way
  A big girl should`,

  `It's time to give the whip a crack
  I'm gonna have to send you back to
  Bitch School
  Bitch School`,

  `You're a beauty
  You're the best of your breed
  You're a handful
  And I know what you need`,

  `You need training
  Gonna bring you to heel
  I'm gonna break you with my will of steel`,

  `Discipline's my middle name
  And no one comes back the same from
  Bitch School
  Bitch School`,

  `No more sniffing strangers, or running free at night
  You think my bark's bad, honey
  Wait till you feel my bite`,

  `Wait till you feel my bite`,

  `You got problems
  You whine and you beg
  When I'm busy
  You wanna dance with my leg`,

  `I'm gonna chain you
  Make you sleep out of doors
  You're so fetching when you're down on all fours`,

  `And when you hear your master
  You will come a little faster, thanks to
  Bitch School`,

  `There's a pulse in the new-born sun
  A beat in the heat of noon`,

  `There's a song as the day grows long
  And a tempo in the tides of the moon`,

  `It's all around us and it's everywhere
  And it's deeper than Royal blue
  And it feels so real you can feel the feeling`,

  `And that's the Majesty of Rock
  The fantasy of Roll
  The ticking of the clock
  The wailing of the soul`,

  `The prisoner in the dock
  The digger in the hole
  We're in this together... and ever`,

  `In the shade of a jungle glade
  Or the rush of the crushing street
  On the plain, on the foamy main
  You can never escape from the beat`,

  `It's in the mud and it's in your blood
  And its conquest is complete
  And all that you can do is just surrender`,

  `To the Majesty of Rock
  The Pageantry of Roll`,

  `The crowing of the cock
  The running of the foal`,

  `The shepherd with his flock
  The miner with his coal
  We're in this together... and ever`,

  `When we die, do we haunt the sky?
  Do we lurk in the murk of the seas?`,

  `What then? Are we born again?
  Just to sit asking questions like these?`,

  `I know, for I told me so
  And I'm sure each of you quite agrees
  The more it stays the same, the less it changes`,

  `And that's the Majesty of Rock
  The Mystery of Roll
  The darning of the sock
  The scoring of the goal`,

  `The farmer takes a wife
  The barber takes a pole
  We're in this together... and ever`,

  `Can't go back
  To London
  Can't go back
  To Swindon`,

  `Can't go back
  To Waterloo
  Can't go back
  To Debra`,

  `Can't go back
  To Sheila
  Can't go back
  To girls like you`,

  `Here she comes
  Lovely
  Here she comes
  Deadly`,

  `Here she comes
  Big as life
  There she goes
  Snubs me`,

  `There she goes
  Cuts me
  There she goes
  Like a knife`,

  `I got
  Diva Fever
  It's staying on me
  Diva Fever`,

  `It's preying on me
  Diva Fever
  She's born to thrill me
  Diva Fever
  It's gonna kill me`,

  `And yet I would gladly die screaming, in insufferable
  Agony, if it meant I could spend my last few moments
  Gazing in her eyes`,

  `It's too late
  Can't go back
  She's too great
  Can't go back`,

  `I can't deny
  There she goes
  Love her
  There she goes
  Hate her
  There she goes
  Want to die`,

  `I got
  Diva Fever
  They'll never cure me`,

  `Diva Fever
  They won't insure me
  Diva Fever
  My demon lover
  Diva Fever
  I shan't recover`,

  `When the game has just been lost
  When the race has all been run`,

  `When the storm has left your ship well tossed
  Ignore the coast`,

  `Get your stars uncrossed
  Back at Square One`,

  `Just begin again
  You can always find a way
  Just begin again`,

  `No matter what they say
  Life is just a wheel
  If it's even real`,

  `You can rest another day
  Life is just a meal
  And you never say when
  Just begin again`,

  `People say enough is enough
  An' people say you can't undo what's done`,

  `People say the road is, just too rough
  But what do they know?`,

  `Life is just a show, go reload your gun
  Just begin again`,

  `Just begin again
  Make the bastards eat their words`,

  `Just begin again
  Like bumblebees and hummingbirds
  Life is just a dream
  An unconscious stream`,

  `A picture, worth five hundred words
  Rise for you are cream
  And you can have the strength of ten
  Mmm, don't hope to win`,

  `Losing is no sin
  So just dig it in
  Just begin again
  Begin again
  Begin again`,

  `Well, you got the eyes, you got the lips
  With your long blonde hair and your wild young hips
  You look like a million, including tips...`,

  `Well, I'm a busy man, baby, can't you see?
  And I got no time for coquettery
  But I'm willing and able to pay the fee if it's

  Cash on delivery`,

  `So make it cash on delivery
  If you're gonna do business with me (Cash!)
  Let's keep it strictly C.O.D. (Cash!)`,

  `Well I love you, baby, but why take a chance?
  I don't want to be a victim of circumstance
  So don't be looking for no big advance, it's...

  Cash on delivery`,

  `Now you got the style and you got the look
  And you got a big hole in your pocket book
  And you gotta buy groceries before you can cook...`,

  `Cash on delivery
  So make it cash on delivery
  That's the way it should be`,

  `Let's make it cash on delivery
  If you want to close a deal with me (Cash!)
  Let's keep it strictly C.O.D. (Cash!)`,

  `So if you want a man that's good and true
  Who's gonna love you no matter what you do
  I'd look somewhere else if I were you...

  Cash on delivery`,

  `But when the deed is done and the lights are low
  You can count your gold in the afterglow
  Love's like money, gotta spend it slow...

  Cash on delivery`,

  `Make it cash on delivery
  I know nothing is free
  Just make it cash on delivery`,

  `If you want to do business with me (Cash!)
  Let's keep it strictly C.O.D. (Cash!)
  Just make it cash on delivery with me (Cash!)`,

  `Bolder than the pirates who used to rule the sea
  Braver than the natives, who never heard of tea`,

  `They never knew what hit them, said the Spaniards later on
  Empire! It was here and now it's gone`,

  `Even the biggest elephant never forgets
  And the sun never sweats. No, the sun never sweats`,

  `You were younger than a virgin, and older than the sea
  You were angel, you were devil, and I was all of me`,

  `You knew you met your master, when I made you stay at home
  Woman! Whatever made you roam`,

  `Even the hardest concrete never quite sets
  And the sun never sweats. No, the sun never sweats`,

  `Losing is for losers, and winners play to win
  Always love the sinner, you may even like the sin`,

  `The door that used to open has now closed without a crack
  Woman, you're like the Empire, and I still want you back`,

  `We may be gods or just big marionettes
  But the sun never sweats`,

  `Life is a gamble, and we're all placing our bets
  And the sun never sweats. No, the sun never sweats`,

  `Here she comes, that rainy day sun
  Peeking in and out the falling raindrops
  Smiling down on everyone`,

  `In her golden, gossamer gown
  And a necklace of the finest rainbows
  Drying out this rainy day town`,

  `Goodbye cloudy skies
  Here she comes, here she comes
  To cut them down to size
  And fly the tears in my eyes`,

  `Here she comes that rainy day sun
  Like a moppet at a birthday party
  Rainy day's not spoiling her fun`,

  `Open up the top of your mind
  Catch the water in your magic paint box
  Oh, the many colors you find`,

  `Goodbye, cloudy skies
  Here she comes, here she comes
  To cut them down to size
  And dry the tears in my eyes`,

  `We are the children who grew too fast
  We are the dust of a future past`,

  `We raise our voices in the night
  Crying to heaven
  And will our voices be heard`,

  `Or will they break like the wind?`,

  `We are the footprints across the sands
  We are the thumbs on a stranger's hand`,

  `We made a promise in the night
  Swearing to heaven
  Is this a promise we keep
  Or one we break like the wind?`,

  `Hey!`,

  `We are the guests who have stayed too long
  We are the end of the endless song`,

  `We send our hearts into the night
  Soaring to heaven
  And will out hearts still beat on
  Or will they break like the wind`,

  `Break like the wind
  Break like the wind
  Break like the wind
  Break, break, break
  Break like the wind`,

  `Late afternoon in the open air
  A human sea made out of mud and hair`,

  `Ain't nothing like a festival crowd
  There's too many people so we play too loud`,

  `Touch down, plane's on the ground
  Look for the drummer, he's nowhere around`,

  `Running late, at least an hour
  No time to rest, no time to shower now we're

  Stinkin' up the great outdoors`,

  `Stinkin' up the great outdoors
  Stinkin' up the great outdoors
  But the kids don't mind`,

  `We had a drink going up in the plane
  We had another coming down again
  We had another in the airport bar
  And then some home-brewed stuff in the promoter's car`,

  `Here we go, on with the show
  We're bubblin' under and we're ready to flow`,

  `Wound up! Turned loose
  Ain't got the power but we sure got the juice and now we're

  Stinkin' up the great outdoors`,

  `Stinkin' up the great outdoors
  Stinkin' up the great outdoors
  But the kids don't mind...`,

  `We hit the stage, with rock and rage
  And do our best to earn the maximum wage`,

  `The lights are bullshit, the sound's for the birds
  Don't know the music and we don't know the words but still we're

  Stinkin' up the great outdoors`,

  `Springtime is on my mind
  Flower bloomin', all the time`,

  `Smell the roses, smell the grass
  Old man winter can kiss my ass`,

  `Don't you think that it's a pity?
  Don't you think that it's a shame?
  Don't you wish that
  Every season was the same?`,

  `Time for lovin' in the park
  Wear a jumper when it gets dark`,

  `Mind the prickles, mind the dew
  Wash your willy when you're through`,

  `Springtime, enough's enough
  Tired of flowers and all that stuff
  Want some drizzle, want some sleet
  Want some wellies on my feet`,

  `I ride cross the desert on my camel
  Over hills of sand
  What's that, I see in the distance?
  Only hills of sand`,

  `There is no oasis in sight
  I'll have to ride through the night
  If I'm to make Baghdad by light of dawn`,

  `The sun's not your friend in the desert
  Like he is at home`,

  `The wind has a name in the desert, sirocco
  But it's barely known`,

  `It's only the hardiest bloom
  That can blossom in darkest Khartoum
  So I will just stay in my room,`,

  `tonight the desert isn't free with her secrets
  She's a silent bird, quiet bird
  I asked the Sphinx for the answer
  It said, 'Mums the word'`,

  `So I'll catch the Zanzibar train
  And sleep till I'm wakened by rain
  And I'm back in old England again once more`,

  `In a hospital bed on the outskirts of town
  Lay an old gray man in a soiled white gown`,

  `His hair was all wispy, his eyes were a blank
  His breath came in spurts from an oxygen tank`,

  `The nurse hovered near, and so did the Reaper
  But which had the number to his private beeper?`,

  `Shall he lie there forever with a tube up his nose
  And his pee-pee and poo-poo slipping out through a hose?`,

  `Or shall he be released to float towards the light?
  Like a wee, baby doveling or a really good kite`,

  `Let him go! Let him go
  It's too late for healing
  Put an end to the pain
  That we know he is feeling`,

  `His life is his burden
  His death is his right
  Let's send him off gently
  Into that good night

  Goodnight`,

  `Well, I'm sittin' here beside the railroad track
  And I'm waitin' for that train to bring her back`,

  `If she's not on the five-nineteen
  Then I'm gonna know what sorrow means`,

  `And I'm gonna cry, cry, cry
  All the way home
  All the way home
  All the way home`,

  `Yes, I'm gonna cry, cry, cry
  All the way home`,

  `Well, her daddy never liked me, this he said
  And he could never get it through his old gray head`,

  `That I loved his daughter so
  I did not mean to see her go`,

  `You're a naughty one Saucy Jack`,

  `When the streetlamp gaslight flickers and fails
  Then you see the last light glinting off the entrails`,

  `Oh naughty naughty naughty

  You're a sneaky one Saucy Jack`,

  `You're a cheeky one Saucy Jack
  First the whore says 'Guv'nor fancy a squeeze?'
  Next you will be shov'in her down the hole to Hades`,

  `The scourge of London Town
  (The scourge of London Town)
  There'll be no rest 'til
  You are a guest of The Crown`,

  `You're a ghoulish one Saucy Jack
  Not a foolish one Saucy Jack`,

  `Though the peelers track you early and late
  Slipping out the back you counter with a checkmate`,

  `Oh naughty naughty naughty
  Naughty naughty naughty`,

  `Little girl, it's a great big world
But there's only one of me
You can't touch 'cause I cost too much`,

  `But tonight I'm gonna rock you (tonight I'm gonna rock you)
Yeah, tonight I'm gonna rock you (tonight I'm gonna rock you)
Tonight!`,

  `You're sweet but you're just four feet
And you still got your baby teeth
You're too young and I'm too well hung`,

  `But tonight I'm gonna rock you (tonight I'm gonna rock you)
Yeah, tonight I'm gonna rock you (tonight I'm gonna rock you)
Tonight, whoa yeah!`,

  `You're hot, you take all we got
Not a dry seat in the house
Next day, we'll be on our way
But tonight I'm gonna rock you (tonight I'm gonna rock you)`,

  `Yeah, tonight I'm gonna rock you (tonight I'm gonna rock you)
Tonight!`,

  `Little girl, it's a great big world
But there's only one of... me!`,

  `Listen to what the flower people say
Listen! It's getting louder every day
Listen! It's like a bolt out of the blue
Listen! It could be calling out for you`,

  `Flower people, walk on by
Flower people, don't you cry
It's not too late, no
It's not too late...`,

  `Listen! It's like a Mozart symphony
Listen! It's something just for you and me`,

  `Listen to what the flower people say
Listen! It's getting truer every day
Ah...`,

  `We came like babies
From our home across the sea to see America
And the people opened up their arms
To welcome us... to America`,

  `We came like children
From a far and distant land to see America
And the golden sun of freedom
Filtered down to us, in America`,

  `And the people stood and stared
Loved us more than we had dared to, in America`,

  `Super highways here and there
Pretty womens everywhere
Brady Bunch and Smokey Bear`,

  `Buildings reaching to the sky
Afro-sheen and apple pie
PTA and FBI`,

  `Jumbo jet begins to rise
A joyful nation waves its bye-byes`,

  `Each religion, race, and creed
Gets exactly what they need
God bless Johnny Appleseed`,

  `Cups and cakes
Cups and cakes
Oh, what good things mother makes`,

  `You've got to take tea won't you take it with me
What a gay time it will be`,

  `Cups and cakes
Cups and cakes
Please make sure that nothing breaks`,

  `The china's so dear and the treacle so clear
And I'm glad that you are here`,

  `Milk and sugar
Bread and Jam
Yes please, sir, and thank you ma'm
Here I am`,

  `Cups and cakes
Cups and cakes
I'm so full my tummy aches`,

  `How sad it must end
But I'm glad I've a friend
Sharing cups and cakes with me
And cakes with me...`,

  `Stop wasting my time
  You know what I want
  You know what I need
  Or maybe you don't`,

  `Do I have to come right flat out and tell you everything?
  Gimme some money, gimme some money`,

  `I'm nobody's fool
  I'm nobody's clown
  I'm treating you cool
  I'm putting you down`,

  `But baby I don't intend to leave empty handed
  Gimme some money, gimme some money
  Oh yeah! Go Nigel, go!`,

  `Gimme some money, gimme some money
  Gimme some money, gimme some money`,

  `Don't get me wrong (gimme some money, gimme some money)
  Try getting me right (gimme some money, gimme some money)`,

  `Your face is okay But your purse is too tight (gimme some money, gimme some money)
  I'm looking for pound notes, loose change, bad checks, anything
  Gimme some money, gimme some money`,

  `Gimme some money, gimme some money
  Gimme some money, gimme some money
  Gimme some money, gimme some money
  Gimme some money, gimme some money
  Gimme some money, gimme some money
  `,

  `The window's dirty, the mattress stinks This ain't no place to be a man I ain't got no future, I ain't got no past And I don't think I ever can`,

  `The floor is filthy, the walls are thin, The wind is howling in my face, The rats are peeling, I'm losing ground. Can't seem to join the human race`,

  `Yeah, I'm living in a hell hole Don't want to stay in this hell hole
  Don't want to die in this hell hole
  Girl, get me out of this hell hole`,

  `I rode a jet stream, I hit the top, I'm eating steak and lobster tails, The sauna's drafty, the pools too hot, The kitchen stinks of boiling snails`,

  `The taxman's coming, the butler quit, This ain't a way to be a man, I'm going back to where I started, I'm flashing back into my pan`,

  `It's better in a hell hole, You know where you stand in a hell hole, Folks lend a hand in a hell hole, Girl get me back to my hell hole`,

  `Working on a sex farm, Trying to raise some hard love, Getting out my pitch fork, Poking your hay`,

  `Scratching in your henhouse, Sniffing at your feedbag, Slipping out your back door, Leaving my spray`,

  `Sex farm woman, I'm gonna mow you down, Sex farm woman, I'll rake and hoe you down, Sex farm woman, don't you see my silo rising high?`,

  `Working on a sex farm, Hosing down your barn door, Bothering your livestock, They know what I need`,

  `Working up a hot sweat
  Crouching in your pea patch
  Plowing through your beanfield
  Planting my seed`,

  `Sex farm woman, I'll be your hired hand
  Sex farm woman, I'll let my offer stand
  Sex farm woman, don't you hear my tractor rumbling by?`,

  `Working on a sex farm
  Trying to raise some hard love
  Getting out my pitch fork
  Poking your hay`,

  `The bigger the cushion
The sweeter the pushin'
That's what I said`,

  `The looser the waistband
The deeper the quicksand
Or, so I have read`,

  `My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo
I'd like to sink her with my pink torpedo`,

  `Big bottom, big bottom
Talk about bum cakes, my girl's got 'em
Big bottom, drive me out of my mind
How could I leave this behind?`,

  `I met her on Monday
'Twas my lucky bun day
You know what I mean`,

  `I love her each weekday
Each velvety cheek day
You know what I mean`,

  `My love gun's loaded and she's in my sights
Big game is waiting there inside her tights, yeah`,

  `Big bottom, big bottom
Talk about mud flaps, my girl's got 'em
Big bottom, drive me out of my mind
How could I leave this behind?`,

  `My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo
I'd like to sink her with my pink torpedo`,

  `Big bottom, big bottom
Talk about bum cakes, my girl's got 'em
Big bottom, drive me out of my mind
How could I leave this behind?`,

  `In ancient times
Hundreds of years
Before the dawn of history
There lived a strange race of people - the druids`,

  `No one knows who they were
Or what they were doing
But their legacy remains
Hewn into the living rock of Stonehenge`,

  `Stonehenge - where the demons dwell
Where the banshees live
And they do live well
Stonehenge - where a man is a man
And the children dance
To the pipes of pan`,

  `Stonehenge - 'tis a magic place
Where the moon doth rise
With a dragon's face
Stonehenge - where the virgins lie
And the prayer of devils
Fills the midnight sky`,

  `And you my love
Won't you take my hand
We'll go back in time
To that mystic land`,

  `Where the dew drops cry
And the cats meow
I will take you there
I will show you how`,

  `And oh, how they danced
The little children of Stonehenge
Beneath the haunted moon
For fear that daybreak might come too soon`,

  `And where are they now, the little people of Stonehenge?
And what would they say to us if they were here tonight?`,

  `MARTY: Hello. My name is Marty DiBergi. I’m a film maker. I make a lot of commercials. That little dog that chases
the covered wagon underneath the sink? That was mine.`,

  `In 1966, I went down to Greenwich Village, New
York City to a rock club called the Electric Banana. Don’t look for it, it’s not there anymore. But that night I
heard a band that for me redefined the word “rock and roll”.`,

  `I remember being knocked out by their, their
exuberance…their raw power — and their punctuality. That band was Britain’s now-legendary Spinal Tap.`,

  `Seventeen years and fifteen albums later, Spinal Tap is still going strong, and they’ve earned a distinguished
place in rock history as one of England’s loudest bands.`,

  `So in the late fall of 1982 when I heard that Tap was
releasing a new album called ‘Smell the Glove,’`,

  `and was planning their first tour of the United States in
almost 6 years to promote that album, well, needless to say I jumped at the chance to make the documentary,
the, if you will, rockumentary that you’re about to see.`,

  `I wanted to capture the, the sights, the sounds, the
smells, of a hard-working rock band on the road. And I got that. But I got more, a lot more.`,

  `But hey —
enough of my yakkin’. Whaddaya say? Let’s boogie!`,

  `<Outside the venue>
FAN 1: Gives me a lot of energy, makes me happy.
FAN 2: Heavy metal’s deep, you can get stuff out of it.
FAN 3: The way they dress, the leather.`,

  `<JFK Airport, New York>
DAVID: Which one is this? Is this LaGuardia or is this— ?
IAN: No, this is JFK.
DAVID: Oh yes.
IAN: New York, New York.`,

  `<Back outside the venue>
ROADIE: Watch it now, watch it now.
ETHEREAL FAN: It’s like you become one with the guys in the band. I mean there’s...there’s no division, you just...the music
just unites people...with the players.`,

  `<Onstage>
NEW YORK MC: You want it right? Direct from hell: Spinal Tap!
—- Spinal Tap performs Tonight I’m Gonna Rock You Tonight —
DAVID: We are Spinal Tap from the UK you must be the USA!`,

  `MARTY: Let’s...uh talk a little bit about the history of the group. I understand, Nigel, you and David originally started
the band wuh...back in...when was it... 1964?`,

  `DAVID: Well before that we were in different groups. I was in a group called The Creatures and w-which was a sk`,

  `DAVID: So we became The Originals.
NIGEL: Right.
DAVID: And we had to change our name actually....`,

  `NIGEL: Well there was, there was another group in the East End called The Originals and we had to rename
ourselves.
DAVID: The New Originals.`,

  `NIGEL: The New Originals and then, uh, they became....
DAVID: The Regulars, they changed their name back to The Regulars and we thought well, we could go back to The
Originals but what’s the point?
NIGEL: We became The Thamesmen at that point.`,

  `DAVID: Joe stumpy Pepys...great great...uh...tall blond geek...with glasses uh...
NIGEL: Uh.. good drummer.`,

  `DAVID: Great look, good drummer.
NIGEL: Good, good drummer...
DAVID: Fine drummer...
MARTY: What happened to him?
DAVID: He died.`,

  `DAVID: He died. He, he died in a bizarre gardening accident some years back.
NIGEL: It was really one of those things...it was...you know...the authorities said...you know...well best leave it
unsolved, really...you know.`,

  `MARTY: And he was replaced by...uh....
DAVID: Stumpy Joe - Eric Stumpy Joe Childs.`,

  `MARTY: What happened to Stumpy Joe?
DEREK: Well, uh, it’s not a very pleasant story..but, uh,
DAVID: He’s passed on.`,

  `DEREK: he died. uh...he choked on..the ac- the official explanation was he choked on vomit.
NIGEL: It was actually, was actually someone else’s vomit.`,

  `DAVID: It’s ugly.
NIGEL: You know. There’s no real....
DEREK: You know they can’t prove whose vomit it was...they don’t have the facilities at Scotland Yard....`,

  `DAVID: You can’t print…there’s no way to print a spectra-photograph.
NIGEL: You can’t really dust for vomit.`,

  `<Reception, New York>
IAN: Here we go...Soho they call this place....
BOBBI: Oh, it’s the band!
DAVID: ‘So’ what?
IAN: Soho.`,

  `BOBBI: How are you? Ian! Hi fellas, how you doing... Come over here. I want you to meet everybody.
DEREK: Who is that?`,

  `BOBBI: Viv, come over here...everybody.
IAN: Bobbi Flekman.
DEREK: Who is it ...with the record company?
BOBBI: Yes, Bobbi Flekman - the hostess with the mostest`,

  `You know, you know. Hi, handsome. How you doing?
Alright, listen I want you all to meet Sir Denis Eton-Hogg, now he’s the head of Polymer.
BAND: We know, we know.`,

  `BOBBI: (To Nigel) You don’t talk so much - just smile and look smart.
DAVID: Oh, she knows...`,

  `BOBBI: Denis, come here...I want you to meet Spinal Tap, our guests of honor.
SIR DENIS: How very nice to meet you!`,

  `BOBBI: Kids; this is Sir Denis Eton-Hogg...this is Nigel.
DAVID: Hello, David St...
SIR DENIS: Oh, so this is Nigel!
NIGEL: Thanks a lot for letting us uh...`,

  `BOBBI: Let’s go over here and we’ll all take a picture together. Where’s Christine? Where’s my photographer? Come
over here honey. What’s your name? Christine? Ok, right over here... good, good!`,

  `REPORTER: You guys look great. I mean you look fantastic. You would never know that you are almost 40. I mean if I
looked this good and from the stage too it’s amazing you know....`,

  `MORTY THE MIME: I did the bird, do the dead bird...change this, get the dwarf canoles the little ones....
  Mime: I did the bird....`,

  `  MORTY THE MIME: C’mon, don’t talk back huh...mime is money, let’s go! Come on; move it!`,

  `SIR DENIS: Now, we here at Polymer we’re all looking forward to a long and...and...and fruitful relationship with Spinal
Tap. We wish them great success on their North American tour and so say all of us: Tap into America!
BOBBI: Yeah!`,

  `Cause Frank calls
the shots for all of those guys.`,

  `Did you get to the part yet where uh..Sammy is coming out of the Copa..it’s
about 3 o’clock in the morning and uh...he sees Frank? Frank’s walking down Broadway by himself....
(Limo window raised by Nigel)
DRIVER: Fuckin’ limeys.`,

  `MARTY: Well you know, ah...they’re not uh,...used to that world.
DRIVER: Yeah yeah.
MARTY: You know Frank Sinatra it’s a different world that they’re in.`,

  `DRIVER: You know, it’s just that people like this...you know... they get all they want so they don’t really understand,
you know...about a life like Frank’s.`,

  `I mean, you know when you’ve loved and lost the way Frank has, then
you uh ...you know what life’s about.`,

  `IAN: As I explained last night, you know, we’re not gonna saturate the New York market....now Philly now that’s a
real rock androll town.`,

  `DAVID: Oh, Philly’s a great town.
IAN: Be assured that the album will be available all throughout the Philadelphia metropolitan area.`,
  `DRIVER: But it’s...it’s a passing thing...it’s uh.... I mean I would never tell them this but this is uh...this is a fad.
—- Spinal Tap plays Big Bottom at Fidelity Hall, Philadelphia —-
<Garden Interview II>`,
  `Intravenus de Milo: “This tasteless cover is a good
indication of the lack of musical invention within. The musical growth rate of this band cannot even be
charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry.
NIGEL: That’s, that’s nit-picking, isn’t it?`,

  `MARTY: ‘The Gospel According to Spinal Tap’: “This pretentious ponderous collection of religious rock psalms is
enough to prompt the question: “What day did the Lord create Spinal Tap and couldn’t he have rested on that
day too?”
DAVID: Never heard that one!`,

  `MARTY: The review you had on ‘Shark Sandwich’...which was merely a two word review - just said “shit sandwich.”
Umm....
DEREK: Where’d they print that, where’d they print that?
DAVID: Where did that appear?
NIGEL: That’s not real, is it?
DEREK: You can’t print that!`,

  `<Recording Industry Convention, Atlanta, Georgia >
DEREK: All those arguments about touring or not touring and all that…it’s obvious we belong on tour, you know....
IAN: I couldn’t agree more. All that stuff about you being too old and you being too white but...`,

  `IAN: It’s a very unimportant reason, it’s just that they’re experimenting with, with some new uh...packaging
materials. Let me get the door.
DEREK: What kind of experimenting? What they got monkeys opening it or what?`,

  `IAN: Oh there’s uhh...the other thing is that the uh...the Boston gig has been cancelled.
NIGEL: What?
IAN: Yeah. I wouldn’t worry about it though. It’s not a big college town.`,

  `PROMOTER: I heard you boys got an album coming out.
DAVID: Yeah, it’s called ‘Smell the Glove’ it should be out now, yeah...yeah...
PROMOTER: Smell the Glove?
EXTRA: It’s a provocative title.
DAVID: Wait till you see the cover, wait till you see the cover, very provcative indeed.`,

  `IAN: Well what exactly...do you find offensive? I mean, what’s offensive?
BOBBI: Ian, you put a greased naked woman...
IAN: Yes...
BOBBI: ...on all fours...
IAN: Yes.
BOBBI: ...with a dog collar around her neck...
IAN: ...with a dog collar...
BOBBI: ...and a leash...
IAN: ...and a leash...`,

  `BOBBI: ...with a dog collar around her neck...`,
  `BOBBI: ...on all fours...`,
  `PROMOTER: Smell the Glove?`,
  `IAN: Sex-ist.`,

  `BOBBI: ...and a man’s arm extended out up to here holding onto the leash and pushing a black glove in her face to
sniffit. You don’t find that offensive? You don’t find that sexist?
IAN: No I don’t, this is 1982, Bobbi, come on.
BOBBI: That’s right it’s 1982! Get out of the 60’s`,

  `IAN: Well you should have seen the cover they wanted to do. It wasn’t a glove believe me.`,
  `BOBBI: And I don’t think that a sexy cover is the answer for why an album sells or doesn’t sell because you tell
me...the “White Album”, what was that? There was nothing on that goddamn cover. Excuse me, the phone’s
ringing. Ian we’ll talk about this after.`,

  `IAN: Okay. Thank you darling.
BOBBI: You’re welcome.....yeah.
IAN: Hello Sir Denis. Hi, how are you? (off phone) Oh, fucking old p******! (in phone) But it’s really not that
offensive Sir Denis come on. Okay. I’ll call you absolutely first thing in the morning.`,

  `(slam phone) Ah, shit.
They are not gonna release the album...because they have decided that the cover is sexist.
NIGEL: Well so what? What’s wrong with being sexy? I mean there’s no....
IAN: Sex-ist.
DAVID: -ist. More than sexy.`,
  `NIGEL: It is and it isn’t, she should be made to smell it, but...`,
  `DAVID: Well it’s a sexual thing, really isn’t it?`,
  `We’ve got, you know,
armadillos in our trousers.`,

  `BOBBI: Okay, listen I wanted to tell you this and…and…I was holding back because I didn’t know what Denis’
decision was going to be…but at this point both Sears and K-Mart stores have refused to handle the album.
IAN: That old one, huh?`,

  `BOBBI: They’re boycotting the album only because of the cover. If the first album had been a hit....
IAN: If the company is behind the album it can shove it right down their throats.`,
  `BOBBI: Money talks and bullshit walks and if the first album was a hit then we could have pressed on them then we
could have told them yes...
IAN: The music....every cut on this album is a hit.`,
  `NIGEL: It is and it isn’t, she should be made to smell it, but...
DAVID: But not, you know, over and over again.`,
  `NIGEL: Cry, cry, cry all the way home...
DAVID: ...fairly simple..... there’s about six words in the whole song, you know.
MARTY: Sounds like a big hit.
DAVID: Just repeat them over and over again.`,
  `MARTY: Let’s talk about your music today...uh...one thing that puzzles me ...um...is the make up of your audience
seems to be ...uh... predominately young boys.
DAVID: Well it’s a sexual thing, really isn’t it?`,
  `NIGEL: Really they’re quite fearful—that’s my theory. They see us on stage with tight trousers. We’ve got, you know,
armadillos in our trousers. I mean it’s really quite frightening...
DAVID: Yeah.
NIGEL: ...the size...and and they, they run screaming.`,
  `<Vandermint Auditorium>
NIGEL: Ian, can I have a word with you for a minute?
IAN: Yes, of course.
NIGEL: ...uh, a couple of problems with the...
IAN: What?
NIGEL: ...arrangments backstage...
IAN: What exactly?
NIGEL: Well, uh..
IAN: What, I mean...`,
  `NIGEL: Well, no, there’s some problems here, I don’t even know where to start, alright? This, uh..
IAN: Soundcheck? What’s, what’s, what’s wrong?
NIGEL: No, no, no, no this....look, look, look, there’s a little problem with the... look this, this miniature bread.`,
  `like... I’ve been working with this now for about half an hour. I can’t figure out... let’s say I want a bite, right,
you’ve got this...
IAN: You’d like bigger bread?
NIGEL: Exactly! I don’t understand how...`,
  `IAN: You could fold this though.
NIGEL: Well, no then it’s half the size.
IAN: Not the bread, you could fold the meat.
NIGEL: Yeah, but then it, then it breaks up, breaks apart like this.`,
  `IAN: Not the bread, you could fold the meat.`,
  `IAN: You could fold this though.`,
  `NIGEL: Would you... be holding this?`,
  `NIGEL: No, alright ‘A’, exhibit ‘A’.`,

  `IAN: No, no, no, you put it on the bread like this, you see
NIGEL: But then, if you keep folding it, it keeps breaking...
IAN: Why do you keep folding it?
NIGEL: And then you...everything has to be folded, and then it’s this, and I don’t want this. I want large bread so that
I can put this...
IAN: Right`,
  `NIGEL: ...so then it’s like this, this doesn’t work because then ...it’s all....
IAN: ‘cause it hangs out like that?
NIGEL: Look...
IAN: Yeah.
NIGEL: Would you... be holding this?
IAN: No, I don’t want to eat... I wouldn’t want to put that in my mouth, no you’re right, Nigel, you’re right...`,
  `NIGEL: No, alright ‘A’, exhibit ‘A’. Now we move on to this, look, look who’s in here? No one! And then in here there’s
a little guy, look! So it’s, it’s a complete catastrophe!
IAN: You’re right, Nigel, Nigel calm down, calm down.`,
  `NIGEL: It’s not gonna affect my performance, don’t worry about it, alright, just hate it, it’s really...
IAN: It won’t happen again.
NIGEL: It does disturb me.
IAN: It’s disgusting.
NIGEL: But I’ll rise above it. I’m a professional, right?
IAN: Alright.`,
  `<Amid Nigel’s Guitar Collection>
MARTY: Do you play all...I mean do you actually play all these or...?
NIGEL: Well, I play them and I cherish them.
MARTY: Mmm-hmm....
NIGEL: This is the top of the heap right here. There’s no question about it. Look at the, look at the flame on that
one....`,
  `MARTY: How much does this...
NIGEL: Just listen for a minute...
MARTY: I’m not...
NIGEL: The sustain..listen to it...
MARTY: I’m not hearing anything.
NIGEL: You would, though, if it were playing, because it really ... it’s famous for its sustain...I mean, you could, just
hold`,
  `
NIGEL: So I strap this...this piece on, you know, right down in here when I’m on stage and....
MARTY: It’s a wireless.
NIGEL: Wireless, exactly. And...uh I can play without all the mucky-muck.
`,
  `NIGEL: Exactly. Now this is special, too, it’s a...look...see ...still got the uh...the ol’ tagger on it...see...never even
played it ...see...
MARTY: You just bought it and....
NIGEL: Don’t touch it! Don’t touch it! No one...no one...no! Don’t touch it.`,
  `MARTY: Well uh I wasn’t...uh I wasn’t gonna touch it...I was just pointing at it...I....
NIGEL: Well don’t point, even.
MARTY: Don’t even point?
NIGEL: No. It can’t be played...never...I mean I....
MARTY: Can I look at it?
NIGEL: No.
MARTY: Don’t look at it.`,

  `MARTY: Don’t even point?`,
  `NIGEL: No.`,
  `MARTY: Can I look at it?`,
  `NIGEL: Eleven...eleven...eleven....`,
  `MARTY: Does that mean it’s..louder? Is it any louder?`,

  `This is a top to a, you know, what we use on stage, but it’s very...very
special because if you can see...
MARTY: Yeah...
NIGEL: ...the numbers all go to eleven. Look...right across the board.
MARTY: Ahh...oh, I see....
NIGEL: Eleven...eleven...eleven....`,
  `and most of these amps go up to ten...
NIGEL: Exactly.
MARTY: Does that mean it’s..louder? Is it any louder?
NIGEL: Well, it’s one louder, isn’t it? It’s not ten. You see, most...most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You’re
on ten here..all the way up...all the way up..`,

  `all the way up. You’re on ten on your guitar...where can you go from there? Where?
MARTY: I don’t know...
NIGEL: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is if we need that extra.. push over the cliff...you know what we do?
MARTY: Put it up to eleven.
NIGEL: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.`,

  `MARTY: Why don’t you just make ten louder and make ten be the top... number... and make that a little louder?
(pause)
NIGEL: These go to eleven.`,

  `Nothing serious, I’m afraid.
IAN: How slight?
SMITTY: You wanted seven, uh, suites.
IAN: Seven. Seven suites.
SMITTY: Yes w-we-he mistakenly put you on the seventh floor with one suite.
IAN: That’s considerably more than minor.
SMITTY: Well, it’s a good-sized room, sir.`,

  `IAN: How slight?`,
  `IAN: Seven. Seven suites.`,
  `SMITTY: Well, it’s a good-sized room, sir.`,

  `SMITTY: Well, it’s a good-sized room, sir. It’s a, it’s a ‘King Leisure’. We can get you a—something.
IAN: How are we going to get fourteen people in a ‘King Leisure’ bed, Tucker?
SMITTY: Oh-ho-ho don’t - don’t tempt me, sir.`,

  `REBA: What’s the problem, sir?
SMITTY: Can you give me a hand, please?
IAN: Yes. I’ll tell you what you can do. OK? This…twisted old fruit here…tells me that you have fucked up my
reservations.
SMITTY: I’m just as God made me, sir.`,

  `SMITTY: I’m just as God made me, sir.`,
  `DAVID: What’s the difference between golf and miniature golf?`,

  `DAVID: What’s the difference between golf and miniature golf?
DEREK: I think it’s-uh...
MICK: The balls.
DEREK: The holes are smaller`,

  `IAN: Good heavens. How are you, laddy?! Great to see you, Ter! Terrific to see you.
TERRY: Uhhhhm...Liam!
IAN: Ian. Ian.
TERRY: Ian. Yeah, listen, we’d love to stand around and chat, but we’ve gotta...sit down in the lobby and wait for the
limo.`,

  `NIGEL: He’s got this much talent — this much if he’s lucky.
DAVID: We carried him. We had to apologize for him with our set.
DEREK: That’s right.
MICK: That’s right, yeah.
DAVID: People were still booin’ ‘im when we were on. It’s all hype. It’s all hype. It’s all bought.`,

  `DAVID: People were still booin’ ‘im when we were on. It’s all hype. It’s all hype. It’s all bought.`,
  `IAN: Because he’s the victim. Their objections were that she was the victim. You see?`,
  `IAN: That’s alright, if the singer’s the victim, it’s different. It’s not sexist.`,

  `IAN: Because he’s the victim. Their objections were that she was the victim. You see?
DEREK: I see....
NIGEL: Oh...
DAVID: Ah....
IAN: That’s alright, if the singer’s the victim, it’s different. It’s not sexist.
NIGEL: He did a twist on it. A twist and it’s..`,

  `IAN: We shoulda thought of that....
DAVID: We were so close....
IAN: I mean if we had all you guys tied up, that probably woulda been fine.
ALL: Ah....
IAN: But it’s...it’s still a stupid cover.
DAVID: It’s such a fine line between stupid an’...
DEREK: ...and clever.`,

  `IAN: We’re-uh. We’re cancelled here.
DEREK: At the hotel?
IAN: No, we’re cancelled - the gig is cancelled....
DEREK: Fuck!
IAN: Uh...it says “Memphis show cancelled due to lack of advertising funds”...`,

  `IAN: We’re-uh. We’re cancelled here.`,
  `you’ve got this cricket bat here...
IAN: Yes.`,

  `you’ve got this cricket bat here...
IAN: Yes.
MARTY: Do you play?
IAN: No, I carry this partly out of, uh, I don’t know some sort of, uh, I suppose what’s the word...uh....
MARTY: Affectation?
IAN: Yes, I mean it’s, it’s, a it’s a kind of totemestic thing you know,`,

  `but to be quite frank with you, it’s come in
useful in a couple of situations. Certainly in the topsy, turvy world of heavy rock, having a good solid piece of
wood in your hand is quite often...useful.
MARTY: Mhmh.`,

  `well, we’ve got some cancellations,
that’s all, we got to Memphis, and there is no gig in Memphis and we find out that this, this promoter in the
Mid-West uhh has pulled out St. Louis, and Kansas City, and uh...oh Des Moines... I don’t know, it’s in Indiana
or something... `,

  `well, we’ve got some cancellations,`,

  `Milwaukee...Milwaukee, Wisconsin...I’ve no idea, you might have to take the plane to New York, and
then get, and then go to, uh, to Milwaukee from there...`,

  `DAVID: Jeanine. She’s going to come meet us. She was supposed to do this uh window layout for Neil Kite’s Boutique,
  but it’s not until April.
  NIGEL: Is she coming to drop some stuff off, you know, and then..
  DAVID: No.
  NIGEL: ...and then go back?
  DAVID: No, she’s coming`,
  `
DEREK: You’re an oldie...you’re an oldie!
DJ: The Thamesmen later changed their names to Spinal Tap they had a couple of B-side hits they are currently
residing in the “where are they now” file. Johnny Q with you on Golden 106 and right after we...
DEREK: Fuck you!`,

  `DEREK: Fuck you!`,

  `DEREK: Not really, not really...voice down...
DAVID: Well it sounds raga, don’t want to go raga on this stuff.
NIGEL: No, not with this you don’t, Well since my baby left me,
DAVID: It sounds...fuckin barbershop...`,

  `DAVID: It sounds...fuckin barbershop...`,

  `DEREK: Hey, watch the, watch the language, you’re paying homage to the King!
DAVID: Oh sorry...well this is thoroughly depressing.
NIGEL: It really puts perspective on things, though, doesn’t it?
DAVID: Too much. There’s too much fucking perspective now.`,

  `DAVID: Too much. There’s too much fucking perspective now.`,

  `<garden interview III>
MARTY: In 1967, uh, you... that was the first time Spinal Tap came into existence?
DEREK: Well, the whole world was changing in those days.
DAVID: And, and we also has the world’s ear.
DEREK: We were changing the world.`,

  `NIGEL: Flower People!
DAVID: We toured the world, we toured the States...
DEREK: We toured the world and elsewhere.
DAVID: It was, it was a dream come true.`,

  `MARTY: Now, during the Flower People period, who was your drummer?
DAVID: Stumpy’s replacement, Peter James Bond, he also died in mysterious circumstances...we were playing a...
NIGEL: Festival...
DAVID: Jazz-blues festival, where was that?
NIGEL: Blues-jazz really.`,

  `DAVID: Stumpy’s replacement, Peter James Bond, he also died in mysterious circumstances...we were playing a...`,

  `NIGEL: And....it was tragic really...he exploded on stage.
DEREK: Just like that...
DAVID: He just went up...
NIGEL: He just was like a flash of green light...and that was it, nothing was left...`,

  `NIGEL: He just was like a flash of green light...and that was it, nothing was left...`,

  `DAVID: You know several...you know dozens of people spontaneously combust each year, it’s just not really widely
reported.
NIGEL: Right.`,

  `IAN: Consider...consider it done.`,

  `—- Spinal Tap performs Stonehenge —-`,

  `DEREK: Maybe we just fix the choreography. Keep the dwarf clear.
DAVID: What do you mean?
DEREK: So he won’t trod upon it.`,
  `DEREK: So he won’t trod upon it.`,

  `IAN: David, whenever a single bump or a ruffle comes into this little fantasy, adolescent fantasy world that you
guys, you guys have built around yourselves...
DAVID: Hey don’t knock it mate. Don’t knock it mate.`,

  `JEANINE: The audience were laughing.
IAN: So it became a comedy number.`,

  `DAVID: It’s all this free time. It’s suddenly time is so elastic..`,

  `DEREK: I mean people...people should be envying us. You know.
DAVID: I envy us.`,

  `(Enter Nigel)`,

  `DAVID: I’m in, I’m in tune...the last tuning`,

  `DAVID: Oh, we’ve got a bigger dressing room than the puppets? Oh, that’s refreshing..`,

  `<Themeland Amusement Park, Stockton, California>
JEANINE: Oh, no! If I told them once, I told them a hundred times: put “Spinal Tap” first and “Puppet show” last.`,

  `DAVID: Ahhhhhhh...`,

  `HOOKSTRATTEN: Ahh...Hookstratten..and you are Spinal Tarp?`,

  `—- Spinal Tap performs Sex Farm —-`,

  `DEREK: Fuck!`,

  `DEREK: We’re very lucky in the sense that we’ve got two visionaries in the band.
MARTY: Right.`,

  `DEREK: Jesus Christ, this is fucking all we need!`,

  `NIGEL: You like this?
MARTY: It’s very nice ...it looks like Halloween...`,

  `MARTY: You play to predominantly, uh predominantly a white audience, you feel your music is racist in any way?
DAVID: No!
NIGEL: No, no, of course not....`,

  `DEREK: ...you know. Now, I mean a song like “Sex Farm”, we’re taking a sophisticated view of the idea of sex, you
know, and music...
MARTY: ...and put it on a farm?`,

  `MARTY: David St. Hubbins...I ne..I must admit I’ve never heard anybody with that name...`,

  `JEANINE: Fuck you too!!!
IAN: And fuck all of you...because I quit! Alright? That’s it! Good night!!!`,

  `JEANINE: Fuck you too!!!`,

  `DAVID: Don’t call her my girlfriend!`,

  `DAVID: Don’t call her my girlfriend!
IAN: Alright, she’s not your girlfriend. I don’t know...`,

  `<Sound check, Shank Hall, Milwuakee, Wisconsin>
NIGEL: Hello, hello, hello, hello
DAVID: Testin’, test, test, test, test “This is mike number one, this is mike number one, isn’t this a lot of fun?”
NIGEL: Two, two.`,

  `NIGEL: I think he’s right, there is something about this, that’s that’s so black, it’s like; “How much more black could
this be?” and the answer is: “None, none... more black.”`,

  `and the answer is: “None, none... more black.”`,
  `<Mick Shrimpton in bathtub>
MARTY: Given the history of Spinal Tap drummers, uh, in the past, do you have any fears, uh, for your life?`,

  `they did tell me, they kind of took me aside and said “Well, Mick, ah, you know
it’s like this” and it did kind of freak me out a bit, but it can’t always happen to every.... can it?
MARTY: Right...right, the law of averages says...
MICK: The law of averages...`,
  `MICK: The law of averages...`,

  `<Tour Bus>
VIV: Ohh, quite exciting, quite exciting this computer magic, wheeeee...
IAN: How many uh planets have you destroyed, Viv?
VIV: Well, four or five, fifth time around I think...really five, few galaxies gone, you know....`,

  `VIV: Ohh, quite exciting, quite exciting this computer magic, wheeeee...`,

  `DEREK: This is Cindy’s first moustache.
IAN: Is it?`,

  `DAVID: Can I take it off now?
JEANINE: Why? Too hot in here?
DAVID: No, it’s...it’s, I thought I might go back to see what they’re up to back there you know, I don’t think they really
need to see this until you’ve finished with it, you know...`,

  `JEANINE: Well, you were reading, you can, you can read here...
DAVID: Yeah, but...they, they’ve got a game back there, thought I’d maybe have a look at the new game, it’s like a
submarine thing.
JEANINE: You’ve got, you’ve got all stuff over you again.`,

  `<David and Jeanine interview>
DAVID: Before I met Jeanine, my life was cosmically a shambles, `,

  `JEANINE: Oh, yeah, I mean listen to him when he’s experimenting, and things like that, don’t I? He’s, he plays things to
me, sometimes when he’s worked up, and he’s got a new bit he wants to tell me about, you know, and I say
“Yeah, that’s good”, or “that’s bad”, or “that’s shit”`,

  `JEANINE: Oh, yeah, I mean listen to him when he’s experimenting, and things like that, don’t I? He’s, he plays things to
me, sometimes when he’s worked up, and he’s got a new bit he wants to tell me about, you know, and I say
“Yeah, that’s good”, or “that’s bad”, or “that’s shit”`,

  `DAVID: Of course, you know, it’s so strange because Nigel and Jeanine are so similar in so many ways, but they just
can’t, they don’t dislike each other at all...
JEANINE: No.
DAVID: There’s great love between the two of them...
JEANINE: Oh,