mrnodebot/scripts/generators/_simpleExcuse.js

Your Friendly NodeJS IRC Bot

const _ = require('lodash');

const firstArray = [
    'Temporary',
    'Intermittent',
    'Partial',
    'Redundant',
    'Total',
    'Multiplexed',
    'Inherent',
    'Duplicated',
    'Dual-Homed',
    'Synchronous',
    'Bidirectional',
    'Serial',
    'Asynchronous',
    'Multiple',
    'Replicated',
    'Non-Replicated',
    'Unregistered',
    'Non-Specific',
    'Generic',
    'Migrated',
    'Localised',
    'Resignalled',
    'Dereferenced',
    'Nullified',
    'Aborted',
    'Serious',
    'Minor',
    'Major',
    'Extraneous',
    'Illegal',
    'Insufficient',
    'Viral',
    'Unsupported',
    'Outmoded',
    'Legacy',
    'Permanent',
    'Invalid',
    'Deprecated',
    'Virtual',
    'Unreportable',
    'Undetermined',
    'Undiagnosable',
    'Unfiltered',
    'Static',
    'Dynamic',
    'Delayed',
    'Immediate',
    'Nonfatal',
    'Fatal',
    'Non-Valid',
    'Unvalidated',
    'Non-Static',
    'Unreplicatable',
    'Non-Serious',
];

const secondArray = [
    'Array',
    'Systems',
    'Hardware',
    'Software',
    'Firmware',
    'Backplane',
    'Logic-Subsystem',
    'Integrity',
    'Subsystem',
    'Memory',
    'Comms',
    'Integrity',
    'Checksum',
    'Protocol',
    'Parity',
    'Bus',
    'Timing',
    'Synchronisation',
    'Topology',
    'Transmission',
    'Reception',
    'Stack',
    'Framing',
    'Code',
    'Programming',
    'Peripheral',
    'Environmental',
    'Loading',
    'Operation',
    'Parameter',
    'Syntax',
    'Initialisation',
    'Execution',
    'Resource',
    'Encryption',
    'Decryption',
    'File',
    'Precondition',
    'Authentication',
    'Paging',
    'Swapfile',
    'Service',
    'Gateway',
    'Request',
    'Proxy',
    'Media',
    'Registry',
    'Configuration',
    'Metadata',
    'Streaming',
    'Retrieval',
    'Installation',
    'Library',
    'Handler',
];

const thirdArray = [
    'Interruption',
    'Destabilisation',
    'Destruction',
    'Desynchronisation',
    'Failure',
    'Dereferencing',
    'Overflow',
    'Underflow',
    'NMI',
    'Interrupt',
    'Corruption',
    'Anomoly',
    'Seizure',
    'Override',
    'Reclock',
    'Rejection',
    'Invalidation',
    'Halt',
    'Exhaustion',
    'Infection',
    'Incompatibility',
    'Timeout',
    'Expiry',
    'Unavailability',
    'Bug',
    'Condition',
    'Crash',
    'Dump',
    'Crashdump',
    'Stackdump',
    'Problem',
    'Lockout',
];

const optionalFourthArray = [
    'Error',
    'Problem',
    'Warning',
    'Signal',
    'Flag',
];

module.exports = async (size) => {
    size = _.isSafeInteger(size) && size > 0 ? size : 1;
    const output = [];
    _.times(size, output.push(`${_.sample(firstArray)} ${_.sample(secondArray)} ${_.sample(thirdArray)} ${_.random(1, true) > 0.8 ? _.sample(optionalFourthArray) : ''}`));
    return output;
};